Thoughts: I'm just a believer.

I'm so far from being a pessimist. I'm really far from being a dreamer. I'm not really a realist, maybe I'm an idealist. I could be an extremist, but I enjoy minimalism. One thing I know is I'm a complete believer. I'm saying this because I believe in chances and hope. 
I'm talking about this because when I look at my life as a whole, it's not the most perfect story. When I look into the mirror, I don't think I'm the person everyone would want to look like, but I believe that I'm enough for the world to appreciate. I don't compare my life to others because what I have is actually good enough. As a whole, my life is perfect the way it is and I know there's always going to be space for improvement and chances, only because I BELIEVE. 

I finally graduated with a degree last December and I was so happy because it was about time! Everyone my age was already working and earning so much! I did feel like I was being left behind by my peers. I was thinking "oh my god... how long will it take me to reach their level?" But I kept believing. I believed that one day a chance is going to come enter my life and I'm going to be just fine. I sent out so many resumes (i'm pretty sure I reached the 500 mark). No one was replying. I was starting to feel insecure and wondered why... I believed in my talents and skills. I had to do something. I started freelancing and putting my works out there. I gave it my all. I started getting promising clients and I started telling myself it was a good start. After 3 months of doing this, I was contacted and asked to fix a start up company's branding and identity. Next thing i know, my ticket was booked. Next thing I know, I'm doing more than branding. I'm handling clients and talking about Marketing Strategies. Next thing I know, I'm sitting with the boss and we're talking about how to make this company grow. Now, we're booking tickets to Hong Kong to take part in a conference. We're talking about Australia and attending an Innovation Symposium. In short, I'm doing what I believed in. I believe that I'm worth it and here I am. I'm being given tasks that would take YEARS for some designers. I know I'm lucky, but this is incredible. Super duper incredible. 

I know that I love working with people. I learned how to communicate with clients and get them excited over projects. Even while I was studying, I took the initiative to talk to people in the industry to understand the ins and outs of branding. I knew I was the kind of person who could be all over the place... like a jack of all trades. I knew I was a little bi-polar when it came to my attitude towards design. BUT, I believed in my talent. I pushed myself so much. I would never stop learning about design. I kept venturing out and looking for books that could help me establish my stand on design. I practiced Photoshop and Illustrator. I learned the things I was never taught by my professors. I put my whole heart and soul into learning more and more. I knew it wasn't a good idea to spend a lot of money, but I always told myself buying books and tutorials is an investment to my future. Now, I'm reading on Content Strategy, Mobile App Design, etc etc. I keep searching and reading on the layouts and styles. This is neverending and I love it! I know I'm doing all of this because I believe I can make things happen. I believe this is who I am. Today, I can say it was all worth it. 

I know I have a lot to work on because I really am all over the place sometimes... but when it comes to the things that matter most to me, I know I can handle myself. I know I can calm my brain down and say HEY CARMS, CALM DOWN! Focus! Do your best! BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. Always believe in yourself. Believe in the things that will bring out the best in you, NOT the things that are selfish and superficial. Your body can feel like it's giving up, but the mind does wonders when you push it. Everyone around you can make you feel inferior or tell you how wrong you are, but when you believe in something you know is good for you... there's always a solution.