2015 wasn't as exciting as my other years. However, it's the year I realized I'm more of a realist / idealist and believer. This only led to making sure I stand my ground and not give in to popular opinion. I definitely had mini-wars and debates with myself because I had to make sure I wasn't living as a close-minded fool. I get where I'm absolutely at and as the year ends, I realize my choice of lifestyle will probably lead me into having a much peaceful and controlled life. I love that.
You see, this year, Life did throw me so many curve balls. Just when I thought my life was going according to plan, things changed and it dragged me down. At the beginning, I was controlling myself pretty well. I was making sure I wasn't going down some mental and emotional downward spiral. I was doing my best not to let out my frustrations on others. I was doing all I can not to breakdown. However, one really bad moment triggered all the sadness to come pouring out of me and it took me a while to climb back out and gain momentum back into my life. I finally reached out and asked for some support and help from my parents. I went out of my way to meet with friends, ask some advice, and allow them to make me laugh. I don't really go out on Sundays, but one of my good friends had a birthday party. So, instead of staying home, I went and I felt something I haven't felt in a long long time. I felt a sense of belonging. I loved socializing and meeting new people. I love testing grounds when it comes to who I am, especially when I'm outside of my house. I love making people laugh and hearing what they have to say. I love listening to other people's journeys and making sure they feel empowered and positive with the road they choose to take. I love making people feel loved and accepted for who they are. There's just so much things I forgot while I was feeling very sad. I'm so glad that I'm ending this year with a positive and hopeful heart and mind.
At the end of the day, stand your ground. It's going to be difficult. It's going to kick your bum until your in so much pain. BUT. You're going to be okay. You need to believe in that and make sure you do all you can to make sure you come out stronger and better. It doesn't happen overnight, but you need it give it your all. You can't use 'things' to improve your personal growth. The answers are all within, so open up your mind and see the many possibilities.
So, 2015, you weren't the best, but you taught me valuable lessons. Time to move on to 2016! I hope and pray for a very good year. A year where I can be more of myself and learn to love harder and better than I did in 2015.